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The 100th episode of Gossip Girl aired Monday night. “G.G.” surprised me in a few ways, including Blair’s decision to go through with the marriage itself, and the fact that it showed it’s final hand by revealing the true identity of Gossip Girl.

That is, if we are supposed to believe that Michelle Trachtenberg’s slithering Georgina Sparks is actually Gossip Girl. She crows something akin to, “Like a phoenix from the ashes, I am reborn!” in her “I’m baaaaack, bitches” sign-off missive as the camera pans from her tiny hands to her chop-licking face. I don’t buy this for a second. I am still unclear as to how Serena and Nate were able to “take down” Gossip Girl after all this time, but I think the real Gossip Girl, the Kristen Bell-voiced omnipresent force of chaos, is lying in wait. Perhaps completely in cahoots with Georgina-as-marionette, but Gossip Girl has demonstrated far too much strategy in her machinations to be Georgina Sparks, who, by the creators’ own admission, would take down herself if it created a ruckus.

To paraphrase Heath Ledger’s Joker: some girls just want to watch the world burn.

I agree with Kelly Conaboy of Videogum who said, “Blair doesn’t let a God she didn’t believe in until two seconds ago stop her!” When Blair marches back out into the sanctuary against the protests of Chuck Bass, perpetual thorn of her heart, her best friend, Serena, and her very smart and reasonable-sounding mother, I thought, “There is the Blair we’ve been missing this season, the Blair who does what her gut tells her and bulldozes everyone around her.”

I took the royal marriage plot for a lost cause until those thrilling final moments, when Prince Louis leans in during the couple’s first dance and hisses, “Smile, Blair, smile for the cameras.” The happy prince shows his true colors, after seasons of vascillating between long-suffering admirer of Blair and creepy, controlling royal brat who pays clinical therapists to commit sabotage and private investigators to stalk his beloved. I knew something was up when Blair first arrived at the wedding-day brunch and Louis shakes his head, in disbelief of his good fortune. “I’m marrying Blair Waldorf; I’m ze luckiest man in ze world.” I suppose we are supposed to believe that up until the mass-texting of Blair’s embarrassing confession, Louis was prepared to love Blair, flaws and all. I think he’s probably having secret incestuous sex with his mom, or sister.

The final surprise, of course, was Blair’s decision to call Dan, not Chuck, for her escape. I won’t let myself believe the writers will let “Dair” happen in earnest. This interview made me wonder how deeply Gossip Girl and other cult shows can be directed by their fanbase’s desires for certain pairings or plot twists, since the “will-they-or-won’t-they” arc came after fans clamored for it.

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Over Thanksgiving, my aunt gave me two small, round soap bars in a brown paper bag. Or so I thought. One is a solid shampoo bar, the other a conditioner bar. She’d procured them from Naples Soap Company, not far from her home. Word was spreading about the incredible healing properties of the founder’s special-blend sea salt soap, concocted with the explicit intent of battling psoriasis and eczema. Having tried a Lush solid shampoo bar once upon a time, I was dubious. Plus, I shampoo my hair very infrequently.

Fast forward to Christmas. In a packing frenzy, I’d thrown both bars into my bag, unsure of what supplies I’d last left at my parents’ place.  And boy, am I glad I did. They are amazing.

Fun fact: I have a lot of hair. A lot. And I go through large bottles of various cheap conditioners (alternating between Trader Joe’s citrus scent and Suave coconut – classic!) like the water that accompanies each condition. And sometimes I feel guilty about the amount of plastic waste this generates.

The conditioner bar is small – I thought it wouldn’t last more than a few washes – and here I am a month later, with near-daily use, and there’s plenty left. It’s amazingly moisturizing, and the smell is as strong as it was when I first used it (a rarity for “bar” bath products – I find that most bar soaps get a weird musty smell pretty quickly, or lose any discernable scent entirely). My hair is softer for it, quite the feat in this daily battle against dry winter air, indoors and out. And I feel better about not having to throw out a plastic bottle every two weeks.

When I replace my current supply of bergamot grapefruit bars, I’ll be trying some of the famous sea salt soap as well. I’m a sucker for citrus scents, and intrigued by this “regular” bar soap labeled “Florida Sunrise.” What would that smell like? Home, I hope.

 

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A friend recently moved back to DC after living in Japan for several years. She described returning to her family’s home to all the possessions she had left to store there during her time abroad, only to find she didn’t understand the value they had to her when she packed them away years ago. “Seize those moments,” she said. “The ones where you don’t feel attached to something anymore.”

I like reading about minimalism. If you were to look at my life, and my surroundings, you wouldn’t know this. There’s a stack of framed art that I haven’t hung on the walls, because I can’t choose what should go up: I love it all. Until this week, my nightstand was covered in three separate stacks of books that I am reading, or want to read, or have read. The books; that’s not necessarily a bad thing. But it’s demonstrative of the way I go through life. I want to read, see, hear, touch, taste everything. But the stack of art? My inability to choose means that I don’t enjoy much of it at all. There needs to be an editorial voice if anything is ever going to be seen.

I’ve been putting things in bags that I don’t use anymore, or don’t resonate with me. Now that I’m back from a trip, I’m going through them again and try to capitalize on that moment of questioning my friend described. Or, I’ll start to, and realize that if I was willing to put them in the bags in the first place, perhaps the time spent sorting them a second time would be better spent getting them out of my home, so I can enjoy what I chose to keep.

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This is how people look at you when you tell them you haven’t seen the show yet.

I became aware of Downton’s runaway popularity months ago at a public broadcasting meeting here in DC. Execs were shown a preview of the BBC miniseries’s second season. Figures showed viewership was up when Downton was on. This could be The Next Big Thing.

Then, my friends started in on it. And not just my friends who usually go for Masterpiece TheatreYou know who you are. Boys, girls, gay, straight, young, old. Then, my parents! What’s the fuss about, I thought? What on this green earth could be so beguiling about a television drama set in the late Edwardian era, that had a teenager and a 93-year-old separately telling me it was their favorite program?

The second season premiered in the US on Sunday night. Armed with a limited knowledge of the first season’s plot structure, I dove in in the company of a hardcore fan. From there it was a slippery slope into a vortex of Netflix streaming.

The cinematography, the elaborate sets and lush landscape, the beautiful people: all key ingredients for a runaway hit. But what really hooks you is the writing. I think dramatic miniseries set in times of yore often get a bad a rap for stodgy, unrealistic dialogue. Granted, the characters in Downton Abbey talk differently than we do, but it’s realistic. They gossip! They mutter! They say really cruel things to one another, then turn on a dime and say the most tender, raw things. Late-Edwardian servants and nobility: they’re just like us!

 

 

 

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I observe the second-to-last sunset of the year. Buzzard’s Bay, Massachusetts.

I’m not going to sugarcoat it. This past year had some very tough spots. In my mind’s eye director’s cut, it was a pretty excellent year. Still, there were moments of sadness, loss, mourning, heartbreak, defeat. To which I say, so long.

I’m ready for you, 2012.

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What can I say about Ryan Adams? His music’s been fairly ubiquitous in my life for the better part of the last decade. From romantic escapades to lie-on-the-floor-and-pray-for-death heartbreak, he just gets it. I’d never seen him live before, and I feel fortunate that my first live Ryan Adams experience was a two-hours-plus solo set that spanned his Whiskeytown days to the present era, all in a beautiful theatre. I reviewed the set for DCist here.

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When I was a student at Cambridge I remember an anthropology professor holding up a picture of a bone with 28 incisions carved in it. “This is often considered to be man’s first attempt at a calendar” she explained. She paused as we dutifully wrote this down. ‘My question to you is this – what man needs to mark 28 days? I would suggest to you that this is woman’s first attempt at a calendar.’
It was a moment that changed my life. In that second I stopped to question almost everything I had been taught about the past. How often had I overlooked women’s contributions?

— Sandi Toksvig.

Thanks to  Sarah, for reminding me again of this quote, and reminding me we have a long way to go in shifting our own paradigms.

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On Friday, a bunch of friends gathered at our preferred watering hole, Dodge City, to celebrate Caroline‘s birthday. Sneaking cake into a bar is tricky, serving it is harder. I spent some time searching for a pumpkin pie Friday evening to no avail (a birthday tradition for her). Turns out they are wildly popular this time of year.

Then, a solution! I remembered Caroline’s deep and abiding love for snack cakes: a love all patriots share. I slipped some pink candles and a matchbook into my jacket at home, and raced to the corner to get a box of hostess cupcakes. At the bar, it was raining. We huddled under the porch above near the heat lamps, next to a grill with several tanks of propane surrounding it (a perfect place to light candles). Within a minute, Amy and I assembled a pyramid of unwrapped snack cakes. Candles lit, the back porch sang.

 

 

Here’s to Caroline (and to more people sharing her unflagging sense of social justice), to more birthdays, to busting out candles and bursting into song with friends and strangers alike.

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Published in the St. Petersburg Times, October 30, 2011:

LIBBY, Richard Lawrence “Dick” passed away the evening of Oct. 12th. Richard was born in Bridgewater, MA on Jan. 13, 1922, the third child of Orrin D. and Katherine R. Libby. A graduate of Massachusetts State College with a double major in physics and chemistry, Richard served in the U.S. Navy as a Chief Specialist (NCO) in radio counter-measure development at the U.S. Naval Research Laboratory in Washington, D.C. There he met Mary Ellen Rivard, a Naval Lieutenant, j.g. who shared the same bus route. They married in 1946. He joined the Air Force’s Rome Air Development Laboratory in Rome, NY in 1951 and for the next 19 years during the Cold War supported the development of technical equipment related to use in Air Force and national intelligence efforts. He was awarded a Commendation for Meritorious Civilian Service by the Air Force in 1957 as the result, he said, of the great work his colleagues and industry associates had accomplished. In 1961, Richard accepted a position at the then new IBM research center near Yorktown Heights, NY. He continued a career in the private industry of electronic equipment development and manufacturing before retiring from his position as Vice President and Member of the Board of the PMC Beta Corp.

Richard said that one of his career’s most interesting tasks was also probably the most ineffectual of his efforts. He served on a Council of Library Resources committee that produced a report, “Automation and the Library of Congress” (1964) that “urged accelerated application of digital technology to the control and use of [its] bibliographic information.” He noted that this task, formidable as it is, essentially has just begun 40 years later.

Upon retirement in 1985, Richard and Mary moved to their new home in Palm Harbor, where for over two decades they enjoyed life and hosted many wonderful friends and members of their large family of five children, eleven grandchildren and six great-grandchildren. In 2006, they moved to Mease Manor in Dunedin. In July 2009, Mary passed away. Richard lived at Oak Manor in Largo until his death. He was preceded in death by his parents, his sister, Barbara M. Libby and his brother, Gordon D. Libby. He is survived by his five children, Karen A. Franklin (Dennis) of Green Cove Springs, FL, Wilfred D. Libby (Michelle) of Punta Gorda, FL, Nancy J. McCarthy (Paul) of Largo, John G. Libby (Yvonne) Carlisle, MA, and Mark A. Libby (Carolyn) of Sudbury, MA; his sister-in-law, Elizabeth Spall of Charlotte, NC, and his dear friend Dorothy Arnold of Largo. In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to the American Diabetes Association.

 

My grandfather wrote a draft of his obituary in 2006. I left that middle part completely intact (minus tense). I had a copy of it to work from, with his handwritten amendments he made in 2009, dated a month after his wife of 63 years passed away. When I wrote her obituary, he and I emailed back and forth with edits. I reread them so I could have his guidance again.

 

I feel that in some way, I will always be reading back over the notes. I will always be sitting on their back porch, watching the lightning storm come in, counting aloud with him how far away each strike is.

I will always be asking why light is faster than sound. I will always be seeking his guidance.

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Couldn’t decide what to dress up as for Halloween, until I was cleaning out my closet, where I found all of the components of this ensemble:

 

via Vogue

That is, everything except a toy sailboat.

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